I am in Love!

Since exams ended, I have been shutting everything out of my mind. Maybe I should not have....because I just found out from my friend that college starts next wednesday. I can't believe I did not know that. I guess I lost the sense of time and space. Weird though. Anyway, it has been a very important holidays. I learned a lot doing practically nothing. since the hols started, I have been sleeping at nearly 4 or 5pm everyday. I never knew that night could be so silent and peaceful. It's nice to just pick up a book and lose myself in someone else's world. It is absolutely liberating. I have also been experiencing whirlwind of emotions. I sometimes feel so happy....happy here meaning I could feel it everywhere. At those times, everyone seem so perfect despite all their imperfection. Maybe it is love....I have finally learned what it truly means to be in love. well, at least my post sounds happy cause I feel like I am at the top of the world right now. Did you know that you got to see the goodness in you first, it's your responsibility to yourself...someone wise told me that. (although it is a common knowledge)

p.s / I am not particularly in love with anyone...I was talking about life.

I feel like an Idiot!

Last Sunday was horrible. My very bad mood persisted to the weekend and I kind of lost the spirit of celebrating Father's Day, my first time. I did not bother giving him any gifts or be bothered at all. I was really MAD. As the weekend passed and I regained some sense of composure, I was totally hit by sadness. I missed Father's Day. It's like one of the most important day in a father's life. I so totally screwed that up for him. My dad probably did not take it that seriously but I am sure he would have felt slightly disappointed. I am thinking of ways to compensate. A gift would just not do...I would probably do a card for him.

Well, it's not like he is going to read this but I just cannot help it:

Happy Father's Day appa!!

Just want to let you know that of all the amazing things you have given us, the best will always be your love, courage and the desire to dream for greatness. Thanks

At the edge of sanity!

These few days has been really volatile. I have been walking at the edge of anger and insanity. Although I have my moments of joy but i have been feeling rather down. My mind is giving in to worries and a sense of helplessness is creeping in. I am looking at things rather pessimistically. People around me are making me tick; i feel like a walking timebomb.

Things became worse today as i could not feel the love or closeness from those whom i care about. My dad has been picking on me and being rather insensitive to things that matter to me. It makes me feel alone and very flawed. Imperfection has to be accepted and appreciated but sometimes unconciously it makes us feel small. I compared myself to others, or those i thought had it better. I miss feeling good about things. It feels like everything's gone out of control.

Back on track...

Well, finally exams are OVER!!! A relief indeed. i think i did quite well for papers i thought i was gonna have a hard time. Sadly, the papers i thought i could easily score was not that easy after all. Overall, i think i feel quite comfortable with what i did. After 6 months of slogging (well, that's what i like to think i did), i finally went to watch a movie. It's has seriously been really long. Kungfu Panda was so entertaining. i think i laughed through the whole show...really a good movie. Po (the panda) dreams of becoming a kungfu fighter but his physical attributes proves to be a barrier. Besides that, he also has to live with his father's expectation of taking over the noodle business (the father by the way is a duck, i think....panda and duck-biology must have sucked). One day, he is chosen as the Dragon Warrior (it is like the ultimate level of warriorhood). But, of course he is not accepted by all the other kungfu people cause he is fat and has no stamina to save himself. He is chosen to protect the people from Tai Lung (a really evil leopard...but totally cool). So, begins the journey of discovering kungfu and one another. The movie actually conveys a very beautiful message, " In life there is no secret ingredients, it's you who make things special". It's a movie everyone should watch because sometimes we often look for miracles outside not realizing that our uniqueness is already miraculous.

Unexpected Events...

On Monday (2nd June) morning at about 3.00 am- 4.00 pm, a thief broke into my house. He entered through the back door, came into my room and my mom's room. He ransacked my jewellery boxes...thank God he did not take my bracelet which was together with all the other fake stuffs. We lost some cash and a notebook. This break-in was really weird. I only went to bed around 2.30 a.m. But i could not sleep since i was stressing out thinking about my exam. Somewhere around 3.55 a.m, I felt someone pouring water on me, that woke me up. From my window, i saw a shadow. i quietly left the room to alert my dad. When i opened my room door, i saw a person standing near the window. Outside, all our stuffs were ransacked. By the time we checked there was no one around. He closed all the back door, leaving no trace of entry except the messy stuffs. This was really scary as no one actually woke up. Why would the thief wake me up and wait for me to alert my dad and then leave?Losing materials is a thing,but to know that someone walked into your house and managed to go out without a hassle is very depressing. i kind of grew paranoid, looking over my shoulder all the time hoping to see a shadow. One tends to suspect everyone when your privacy is invaded.
The next incident happened two days later. Some one tried to break-in. So, we had to call the cops. I just so completely hate them!!!

My Home...Yours as Well...

I came across this video in a blog called Niamah. Absolutely amazing!! This is an effort by the the Malaysian Artistes For Unity. This is like a free contribution from all the parties involved. Their aim is to create a video which trancends races and diversity. Any version of 'Here in My Home'
can be down loaded from www.malaysianartistesforunity.info.

Personally, I truly enjoyed 'Here in My Home'. It reflected my thoughts of a single nation. I have always saw Malaysia as one nation yet with divisions. Many have not accepted the concept of 'Satu Bangsa, Satu Malaysia'. Many of the negative aspects of our country are surfacing nowadays, making many feeling like step-children. Amidst all this, when a genuine efforts spring from the people....it truly brings hope that we can still work the single Malaysian identity. It could be a Malaysia where everyone truly embrace their differences and ultimately celebrate their diversity. A time where we would be known as only Malaysians…living up to the promise ‘Malaysia Truly Asia’.


Let us not be judged by the colour of our skin...but by the content of our character - Martin Luther King

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8Wl3firJQk