Monday, January 18, 2010


I have always been the kind of girl who say it as it is. I do not really give it a thought as to how whatever I say would mean to the other person. I am not mean, but I am quick to point out when people cross their line. I voluntarily choose to be direct as opposed to being a hypocrite.

This has made everyone believe that I am very open about my feeling. That is far from the truth. I am one of those who carry my loved ones secrets, weaknesses and pain they inflict inside. I can never find words to express my pain or disappointments. I may pick fight on petty things but when it comes to those serious issue, I coil up in fear. I do not want to lose those I hold close to my heart. It is bad enough that I don't trust easily.

As years went by, I became good at putting on a "I don't care" look. I am good at pretending that I'm okay. It keeps me sane. Again now, those fears are back. They are hurting me, especially those closest to me. How can I ever tell let me go? I want to sleep a good night's sleep without worrying. I want to believe in life's magic; those special moments.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

hey girl,
i'm surprised to read something which is this closely related to my deepest thoughts. the reason it has tempted me to comment. very well said.

btw, allow me to introduce myself. i'm misha, perhaps u would know me. anyway, i hope u wouldn't mind me adding up ur blog to my blogroll @

best regards :)